20 Twenty Things Every Sci-Fi Nerd Should Own Physically and Emotionally
So you think you’re a NERD. Not the kind of nerd that would hang out with Lamar and Booger and the other Tri-Lams–BUT a REAL Sci-Fi NERD. Whell let’s just how how nerdy you really are. Below is a little checklist of 20 Things Every Sci-Fi Nerd Should Own To Earn, physically as well as emotionally. If you “own” at least twelve of these twenty things, you are entitled to your SCI-FI Nerd Badge.
My name is Hal Hefner, I am a Sci-Fi nerd. I create Sci-Fi nerd dreams with my comic Gates, the flagship product of an epic science fiction franchise. How nerdy are you?
Go for it. I dare ya…
1) Conan The Barbarian Soundtrack:
If you are a fan of the movie, Conan the Barbarian then you know how awesome the soundtrack is as well. Great music by Basil Poledouris set the tone of the movie and is an epic score to kick ass to.
2) Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep:
This is the book by Phillip K. Dick that inspired Ridley Scott’s Bladerunner. It’s good, real good and in fills in lots of holes in the movie and also gives you a different twist on it. Great, easy read even for you folks out there who haven’t read a book since college.
3) The Twilight Zone Collection:
The Twilight Zone is one of if not the greatest TV show ever. For any aspiring Sci-Fi geek and or creator, it is essential guide to storytelling, RIP Rod Serling, a genius way ahead of his time.
4) The Original Star Wars Trilogy – WITHOUT ANY ADDED CRAP
We didn’t need Boba Fett and Jabba to show up in the a New Hope. We didn’t need anymore crappy creatures that added no value and we all certainly know: HAN SHOT FIRST.
5) A Profound Hatred for Star Trek Enterprise:
Need I say more? Okay, I will. Brannon Braga’s take on the Star Trek universe was crap.
6) The Lord of The Rings Extended Edition, The Soundtracks and all of the books;
You’ve gotta own it all. Own it. Live it. Love it.
7) A Profound Sadness for the Way Battlestar Galactica Ended:
There’s a lot of us that feel we got hosed with that ending. I can still hear Jim Hendrix’s, All Along the Watchtower playing in my head and I’m thinking WTF is this?
8 ) A Passionately Favorite Version of the REAL Doctor Who:
Tom Baker. Period. And I will gladly meet you in an alley to fight about it.
9) A Fear That Will Smith Will Someday Star in The Movie Adaptation of Your Favorite Book:
Every character is the same, that wise cracking boy from Philadelphia living with his cousin Carlton and Uncle Phil.
10) Toys from Your Childhood That You Refuse To Part With:
I still have my original Kermit the Frog from when I was three and my first Boba Fett. Trump that.
11) The Belief that the Word Midichlorian Was Just from a Nightmare and NOT a real Star Wars Movie:
This is just a dream. Metachlorians are not real. Seriously. It’s just a bad joke and it will be over when I wake up. AHHHHHHHH!!!!!
12) The Original Tron Movie:
You own it. You love it. It loves you.
13) An affection for the TV show Firefly:
Every Sci-Fi nerd loves this show. If you don’t you are a loser.
14) A Hatred for Chris O’Donnell:
As Robin, he was the harbinger of death for the original Batman movie franchise.
15) You Know Asimov’s Three Laws of Robotics:
Learn it now if you don’t know it.
16) You think Cheetara is HOT!
The star of two version of Thundercats cartoons was also the star of your wet dream. Admit it, you’d love to let her claw your back and bite your neck. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
17) You Believe Aliens are our REAL Gods:
If you read enough science fiction, and of the right kind, all of those books questioning are existence in the universe, finally open up some possibilities for you. BUT depending on where you live, who your parents are and who you are sleeping with, you may not admit this in public.
18) You Have a Favorite Animated Cult Sci-Fi Movie:
There are so many to pick from. Many will choose Heavy Metal.
19) You Blame Hot Rod for Optimus Prime’s Death:
Well, it was his fault. And after Optimus rose form the grave Rodimus got hosed. AND DESERVEDLY SO!
20) You DESPISE Michael Bay for Masturbating on your Childhood.
The king of explosions, inexplicably keeps making million dollar movies and in the process he has destroyed the Transformers and has now decided to shit on the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles by making the aliens in his new adaptation. Someone needs to destroy the people at Paramount for allowing him to live. Michael Bay is the fucking anti-Christ.
Discussion (18) ¬
3,5,7, 8, 9, 12, 14,16, 17, 19 no. Sorry. Disagree. Will Smith has more range than you give him credit for. The problems with Batman started LONG before Chris O’Donnell. Tron is bleh. Cheetara? Come on. Gave up on Dr. Who in the 70s with the stupid cabbage wrapped in tin foil effects. And 19 who cares. Twilight Zone has a few great ones and some lame ones. And Enterprise was not that bad.
Grumpy nerd passion is exactly what I was looking for! Hurray! Thanks for disagreeing! What would you add to this list that’s not on there? I could have easily doubled it…
I wish NOT having most of this stuff (haven’t even heard of a few) is evidence of not being a nerd…
Will Smith is a good actor but he’s had the lead or a major role in several bad movies with big budgets. It’s not is fault, but fear of his presence is legitimate.
You either hate him or love him. “AWWWW HELL NO”
Funny – this is mostly non-lit based and doesn’t characterize foundation al geekdom in any way – more like a layered on, most recent pop crap version.
If you said something like – owns a laserdisc of 2001 A Space Odyssey – and the player to play it on…or still reads fanzines….or has a signed photo of their visit to 4E Ackerman’s house – or even owns the issue of Astounding that published Asimov’s laws of robotics – it might.qualify for geek cred
STEVE! You just won the Asimov reference award! COME ON DOWN! You are the official sci-fi nerd of the month for April! Congrats! Now it’s time to put on your MOrk and Mindy pajamas, give that autographed poster of My Favorite Martian a kiss and go to bed happy and proud that you are the coolest sci-fi guy around! HURRAY!
1) My personal beliefs about owning more than 30 CDs stand in the way. But it is an awesome soundtrack Score +0.25
2) My personal beliefs about how many books I should have on my shelves stand in the way. But I own & am reading the Exegesis. score +2.00
3) I place it on a pedestal, & have read adaptations of several episodes, but this would be a substantial investment. score +0.25
4) The Original Star Wars Trilogy – WITHOUT ANY ADDED CRAP
I don’t even allow ‘Jedi. score +1.25
5) It was terrible. +1.00
6) Jackson almost butchered the original Original Trilogy. As a self-styled elitist & almost bounced the whole list because of this… but I’ll be generous with you instead. score -1.00 to me, +42.00 to anyone who ditched on the project because of it.
7) Didn’t even watch it. I assume this earns me score -1.00
8 ) Tom Baker. Exclamation Point! score +1.00
9) Sure… though mainly I dread seeing any beloved story lobotomised for the big screen. score +1.00
10) Definitely. score +1.00
11) I’m not sure what you are talking about here, but it sounds terrible. score +1.00
12) Hail! Hail! Hail! score +1.00
13) Just typing my answer makes me smile… love it. score +1.00
14) See #9. score ±0.00
15) Damn straight. & my wikipedia article would be both better & better defended from wikiphilic thimbleheads. score +1.00
16) Meh. You know who’s hot? Ika, daughter of Ogeode, from The Saga of Crystar: Crystal Warrior… after her transformation to living crystal, of course. score +0.25
17) I’ll take +2.00 for being an atheist about gods AND aliens.
18) I pick Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind, but I’ll only take +1.00 because I’m a gentleman.
19) Meh. But I did write a version of D&D for Transformers in 1982. score +.01
20) Yup. score +1.00
TOTAL HEF SCORE: +14.01
NICE! I need more stuff on there…20 is not enough. not even close.
Hipsters are the enemy of the nerd, geek, and otaku.
Hollywood loves Micheal Bay, while fans hat him. Hollywood hates James Cameron, while fans love him. Obviously Hollywood is disconnected from the fanbase.
HAHAHAHA! Hipsters…I’m surrounded by them. AHHHHHHH!!!!!
1) Conan The Barbarian Soundtrack
No question
2) Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep
still need to read this…time, all the time in the world right?
3) The Twilight Zone Collection
Mutant genius!
4) The Original Star Wars Trilogy – WITHOUT ANY ADDED CRAP
HAN DID SHOOT FIRST…that is all!
5) A Profound Hatred for Star Trek Enterprise
Kill the idiots who did this please!
6) The Lord of The Rings Extended Edition, The Soundtracks and all of the books
Duh! 9+ hours of glorious movie. Peter Jackson must be worshiped!
7) A Profound Sadness for the Way Battlestar Galactica Ended
I don’t feel like I got hosed, I feel like I got fucked by a bunch of idiots with anal probes! All Along the watchtower by Jimi Hendricks, great song but used for the show…wtf did it have to do with anything other than the writers and producers were apparently on an Acid Trip because they could figure out how to end the show.
8) A Passionately Favorite Version of the REAL Doctor Who
It’s what I grew up on! I’ll join you in that alley and defend!
9) A Fear That Will Smith Will Someday Star in The Movie Adaptation of Your Favorite Book
I do like Will Smith, but there are no other actors on the planet who can do this???
10) Toys from Your Childhood That You Refuse To Part With
I lost almost every one of the ones I was keeping when my parents just threw several boxes of things away. This included the ENTIRE GI Joe Adventurer series that they just gave away with no cause, sigh. But I was able to reaquire the Original Matchbox release of Voltron III (1984)
11) The Belief that the Word Midichlorian Was Just from a Nightmare and NOT a real Star Wars Movie
How much more punishment can a Star Wars fan take??? I guess the only thing worse was a whiney bitch who becomes the most feared Darth in the universe?
12) The Original Tron Movie
Duh!
13) An affection for the TV show Firefly
I unfortunately missed it the 1st time around, I have since rectified this situation
14) A Hatred for Chris O’Donnell
Um…weasel
15) You Know Asimov’s Three Laws of Robotics
Like…Duh!
16) You think Cheetara is HOT!
She can flay me anytime!
17) You Believe Aliens are our REAL Gods
Again…Duh!
18) You Have a Favorite Animated Cult Sci-Fi Movie
My top 20 Sci-Fi Movies
Heavy Metal
The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension
The Day the Earth Stood Still (1951)
Planet of the Apes (1968) “Take your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape!”
Forbidden Planet (1956)
The original Star Wars trilogy
Silent Running
Tron
The Andromeda Strain
Fantastic Voyage
Godzilla
Videodrome
Mad Max & The Road Warrior
Barbarella
Altered States
THX 1138
Rollerball (1975)
2001 Space Odyssey
Blade Runner
Alien
20) You DESPISE Michael Bay for Masturbating on your Childhood
In regards to TMNT, I was not aware of this atrocity!
Badlvillemojo, your top 20 Sci-Fi list is extraordinarily strong. Of course after The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension it’s all gravy. But then out of nowhere, BAM! Videodrome! And then, POW! Altered States! Sweet.
1) I have not seen the movie, nor do I own the soundtrack. -1.00
2) Would like to own it, but have no money for books, or anything for that matter. +0.50
3) It’s a good show but it’s not the sort of thing I’d want to own, I’ve thought about it. When I watch the twilight zone it’s at night after all of the late night comedy and I’ve been awake since six that morning and I’m half falling asleep. If I owned it, I’d watch it in the middle of the day because there’s nothing on TV and then I’d not have the same experience with the twilight zone. +0.50
4) I don’t own any of the star wars trilogies, mainly due to financial reasons though I have to say it even though you’ll eat me alive, I liked episodes I and II. And the only reason I didn’t like episode III is because I had a crush on young Anakin and I didn’t like watching him burn. -1.00
5) Yes though recently I’ve decided I actually have to watch the whole series so that I can be truly well-rounded and well I don’t want to be biased. +0.80
6) I wish, again financial constraints. +0.50
7) Wasn’t all along the watchover originally written by bob dylan? Oh but then it was covered nevermind… I think… I didn’t watch that series. +0.00
8) I disagree with you, not on scarf, I loved scarf. But you’re “real doctor who” most of the people agreeing with this wouldn’t have ever watched the 1963 series if they hadn’t restarted it in 2005. They’re posers and I don’t think that’s fair, frankly it’s hipsterish. I don’t care I get to score myself +2.00 for revealing a flaw and +1.00 for liking doctor who.
9) Will smith Will, that caught me a few times. Not really. Kind of. +0.25
10) My childhood was sadly amiss in terms of anything child like. I grew up watching the BBC CSI and betamax tapes of protests being covered on the BBC. +0.50 because I would’ve
11) What? I never saw that. +2.00
12) No, I don’t again. Not a very good movie collection, that’s why I have friends. I want to state my movie collection but I’d have to take off tons of points and I’m running low. +0.25 because I’d like to.
13) I love Firefly, I wish it hadn’t been canceled. I’m an actor and I have this dream that they’ll remake it and I’ll play River. +5.00
14) I was never into the batman movies, I always had an issue with comic book movies because my brother was a spiderman guy and I’m arachnophobia, now I liked the 60’s cartoon because there were no spiders in the cartoon but I still cannot watch to this day the spiderman movies, that translated to a deep hated of all comic book movies, except fantastic four. +0.50
15) Yes, there all very clausal, this bothers me, but not profoundly. +1.00
16) I’m a straight girl…. +0.25
17) no, I do think they’re out there, It’s possible they’ve posed as gods, but I’m not taking it to hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy level in that saying they created us. +0.75
18) Does it have to be animated? Is fantastic planet cult? so many questions so little time. +1.00
19) I didn’t watch/read/play transformers. -0.50
20) MY childhood didn’t HAVE Michael Bay! +2.00
Total; (+)15.30
That’s not very accurate. Damn.
I am not a SCI-Fi nerd at all. But Cheetara it is so freaking hot !!!.. I used to play like I was her when a kid…