So you think you’re a NERD. Not the kind of nerd that would hang out with Lamar and Booger and the other Tri-Lams–BUT a REAL Sci-Fi NERD. Whell let’s just how how nerdy you really are. Below is a little checklist of 20 Things Every Sci-Fi Nerd Should Own To Earn, physically as well as emotionally. If you “own” at least twelve of these twenty things, you are entitled to your SCI-FI Nerd Badge.
My name is Hal Hefner, I am a Sci-Fi nerd. I create Sci-Fi nerd dreams with my comic Gates, the flagship product of an epic science fiction franchise. How nerdy are you?
Go for it. I dare ya…
1) Conan The Barbarian Soundtrack:
If you are a fan of the movie, Conan the Barbarian then you know how awesome the soundtrack is as well. Great music by Basil Poledouris set the tone of the movie and is an epic score to kick ass to.
2) Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep:
This is the book by Phillip K. Dick that inspired Ridley Scott’s Bladerunner. It’s good, real good and in fills in lots of holes in the movie and also gives you a different twist on it. Great, easy read even for you folks out there who haven’t read a book since college.
3) The Twilight Zone Collection:
The Twilight Zone is one of if not the greatest TV show ever. For any aspiring Sci-Fi geek and or creator, it is essential guide to storytelling, RIP Rod Serling, a genius way ahead of his time.
4) The Original Star Wars Trilogy – WITHOUT ANY ADDED CRAP
We didn’t need Boba Fett and Jabba to show up in the a New Hope. We didn’t need anymore crappy creatures that added no value and we all certainly know: HAN SHOT FIRST.
5) A Profound Hatred for Star Trek Enterprise:
Need I say more? Okay, I will. Brannon Braga’s take on the Star Trek universe was crap.
6) The Lord of The Rings Extended Edition, The Soundtracks and all of the books;
You’ve gotta own it all. Own it. Live it. Love it.
7) A Profound Sadness for the Way Battlestar Galactica Ended:
There’s a lot of us that feel we got hosed with that ending. I can still hear Jim Hendrix’s, All Along the Watchtower playing in my head and I’m thinking WTF is this?
8 ) A Passionately Favorite Version of the REAL Doctor Who:
Tom Baker. Period. And I will gladly meet you in an alley to fight about it.
9) A Fear That Will Smith Will Someday Star in The Movie Adaptation of Your Favorite Book:
Every character is the same, that wise cracking boy from Philadelphia living with his cousin Carlton and Uncle Phil.
10) Toys from Your Childhood That You Refuse To Part With:
I still have my original Kermit the Frog from when I was three and my first Boba Fett. Trump that.
11) The Belief that the Word Midichlorian Was Just from a Nightmare and NOT a real Star Wars Movie:
This is just a dream. Metachlorians are not real. Seriously. It’s just a bad joke and it will be over when I wake up. AHHHHHHHH!!!!!
12) The Original Tron Movie:
You own it. You love it. It loves you.
13) An affection for the TV show Firefly:
Every Sci-Fi nerd loves this show. If you don’t you are a loser.
14) A Hatred for Chris O’Donnell:
As Robin, he was the harbinger of death for the original Batman movie franchise.
15) You Know Asimov’s Three Laws of Robotics:
Learn it now if you don’t know it.
16) You think Cheetara is HOT!
The star of two version of Thundercats cartoons was also the star of your wet dream. Admit it, you’d love to let her claw your back and bite your neck. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
17) You Believe Aliens are our REAL Gods:
If you read enough science fiction, and of the right kind, all of those books questioning are existence in the universe, finally open up some possibilities for you. BUT depending on where you live, who your parents are and who you are sleeping with, you may not admit this in public.
18) You Have a Favorite Animated Cult Sci-Fi Movie:
There are so many to pick from. Many will choose Heavy Metal.
19) You Blame Hot Rod for Optimus Prime’s Death:
Well, it was his fault. And after Optimus rose form the grave Rodimus got hosed. AND DESERVEDLY SO!
20) You DESPISE Michael Bay for Masturbating on your Childhood.
The king of explosions, inexplicably keeps making million dollar movies and in the process he has destroyed the Transformers and has now decided to shit on the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles by making the aliens in his new adaptation. Someone needs to destroy the people at Paramount for allowing him to live. Michael Bay is the fucking anti-Christ.